Ep. 54: Opening Up About Sacrifices I Had To Make To Build A Successful, Thriving Beauty Business
WARNING: THIS MIGHT INSPIRE YOU TO STOP BEING SOFT ABOUT YOUR GOALS!
I love talking about my business, you know this. I love helping others realize their dreams and their potential. I think one of the best things that we can do as entrepreneurs is share our journeys. It helps those who are getting started or who are struggling no that they're not alone.
In this podcast episode, I got to talk with Courtney Clarke for her amazing podcast Women On Top, which I'll link down below so you can check it out. She really got me to open up and dive into some things that I've never shared publicly before. It was kind of scary, no lie, but it felt so good and I know that the things I share in this episode will be extremely helpful for you as a beauty business entrepreneur.
We talk about my parent's rise from being immigrants, my first heartbreak, what made me such a fast achiever, and I share my marketing secrets for PMU boss babes.
Here are the episode highlights:
‣‣ [12:23] Some of you may know this, some of you probably don't, but I wasn't always the badass business babe you see today. I mean, it was always there inside of me, you know, but I wasn't in touch with her. You could say I was a bit of a hot mess before I got it all together. We talk about that girl here.
‣‣ [17:27] My shift from self-described hot mess to boss business babe didn't happen overnight. Definitely not. Courtney and I talk through some of the different shifts that took place before I got anywhere close to where I am now.
‣‣ [22:24] If you know me, you know that I built my multimillion-dollar business in three years. That was never really my plan when I was looking to get out of the foodservice industry. I talk more about my journey to PMU success here.
‣‣ [24:39] I think that everyone has an example that they look to for their work ethic. For me, it was my dad.
‣‣ [27:29] Courtney and I talk about overcoming your fear of others' opinions and what they'll think about you in order to reach the success you're dreaming of.
‣‣ [32:26] To get to who I was before to who I am now, I had to go through a big transformation. I had to do a lot of unlearning.
‣‣ [35:35] When I first got introduced to the permanent makeup industry I instantly recognized that it needed a makeover. It needed a total upheaval. And I was determined to turn it into what I knew it could be. Courtney and I talk about that process here.
‣‣ [38:08] If you don't know, I was married before I met my now-husband, Will. I realized we needed to get a divorce when I started to focus on myself and grow more. We weren't growing at the same rate. That's never an easy position to be in.
‣‣ [44:04] Some of the mistakes I made at the start of my career that I really wish someone would have just told me at the very beginning.
‣‣ [50:24] If you know me you KNOW I'm always stressing the importance of being a person with your business, with your product. If you haven't ever heard that before, listen up because it's the key to your success.
‣‣ [55:06] I give Courtney my top tips for marketing.
I'M READY TO ACHIEVE MY GOALS! (Listen Here)
Talking with Courtney really felt like sitting down and talking to my therapist, in the best way possible. If you want to keep up with her and her amazing podcast Girls On Top, you can find her right here!
You can follow me, Sheila Bella, on Instagram @realsheilabella!
Here are the links that were mentioned in the podcast!
Grow Your Gram
Online Course Workshop
FOR MY LISTENER BOSS BABES
You can enjoy this podcast by downloading it on iTunes here.
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FOR MY READER BOSS BABES
You can enjoy a transcript of the podcast here.
Sheila Bella:
Welcome to the Pretty Rich podcast, where every woman is the heroine of her own story. I'm your host, Sheila Bella and I built a million-dollar beauty business from nothing. Maybe if you listen enough, you'll start to believe that you can do it too, because if the perfect job doesn't exist, well, you can create it. If the job you want isn't hiring you, you can unapologetically hire yourself. Each episode will equip you with empowering conversations on how to grow a lifestyle that's pretty rich in love, beauty, wellness, and financial wealth. I'm Sheila Bella, beauty business coach, celebrity brow artist, global success speaker, author, serial entrepreneur, wife, mother, friend, daughter, and your forever positive beauty biz sales guru. Let's go.
Hey friends. How are you? Good to be podcasting with you again, this is Sheila Bella, and you're listening to the Pretty Rich podcast. Today's episode is with Courtney Clark. She interviewed me for her podcast Women on Top, and I had so much fun with her. I am repurposing this interview for this podcast because she asked me some pretty thought provoking questions and made me reveal things I've never revealed before. Just a quick life update. I just got back from celebrating my seven-year wedding anniversary with our friends and family on Catalina Island where we got married, and if you guys haven't been, you need to go.
It's like a ferry ride off of the coast of California and it's this little town with no vehicles, all golf carts, and it's this little utopia. We spent the day with the family in a cabana with a butler. Oh my God, do I love cabana life? And I freaking love the beach. There's something about being next to the water that really calms me and centers me, which is why I decided to have my event, The Pretty Ambitious Summit, right on the beach in Santa Monica, California, if you haven't heard about it, I'm about to tell you. The Pretty Ambitious Summit is the first live event of its kind and I'm so excited to have created it. It has a focus on business, marketing.
I've been to all of these different permanent makeup events and beauty industry events and I think that there is a major focus on the artistry and technique, but there wasn't enough that I've seen that has a focus on business strategy, marketing and networking. I wanted to create a "You can sit with us" type of event. You know what I'm saying? Where collaboration is the focus. Guys, I have some pretty amazing speakers that I have lined up and I just got a bunch of speaking contracts back. I'm really excited. I'm still not going to share with you guys who the speakers are yet, because I wanted to give you guys an opportunity to receive a massive discount for those of you who just trust me, who trust me right now, even before I announce the speakers.
I have some pretty incredible people talking about sales strategies for building your beauty business, how to create passive income as an artist, as a PMU artist, or a lash technician, there are different ways that you can do that, because newsflash, it's not just about being behind the chair. You can make money passively doing other things as a beauty entrepreneur. I have somebody incredible talking about product development. I have somebody whose Instagram is flawless you guys, and she's going to share her secrets for how she edits her before and after pictures, her transformation pictures. You know those trainers that do these "national tours", you know what I mean?
They seem to be announcing a class in another exotic city somewhere in the United States or overseas. Then it always says, "Sold out", and you guys are probably like, "How are they doing this? How are they just traveling the country, selling out their classes all over the world, all over the United States?" Well, I have somebody that is just like that, who will be teaching you how to book out you're PMU training tour or whatever training tour. Once you guys find out who it is, you guys are going to flip. You're going to be like, "My gosh, this girl is actually sharing her secret. I've always wanted to know how she does that."
Even though I haven't told you exactly who the speakers are, I gave you a little bit of a rundown of just some of the things that will be covered at Pretty Ambitious Summit this year or next year, 2020. Anyways. Just so you guys know VIP tickets are selling out and we have a limited number of VIP tickets. So, because I know that you guys want the best, you guys want the VIP, you want the elite level tickets, I decided to give you guys a very special discount code that's only going to be active until I do announce the speakers as a simple, thank you for trusting me.
All you have to do is go to sheilabella.com/prettyambitioussummit and for the elite and the VIP level tickets, you can get $125 off by typing in the code in all caps, "MY AMBITIOUS FRIEND". MY AMBITIOUS FRIEND, $125 off elite and VIP tickets valid only, only until I announce the speakers, which should be very soon, very soon. Actually we're just waiting for our graphics guy to get everything together. Don't miss this opportunity. Sister, you deserve to be in that room. Okay, back to today's podcast. Before I dive in to the interview, I wanted to read the review of the week. We have an iTunes review from Radiance Beauty.
She says, "You're the best Sheila Bella. I went through this whole podcast in less than two weeks listening to it on my way to work, on my breaks, on my way home and even on my days off. Sheila, you are truly an inspiration and this podcast brought me so much motivation to keep pushing. I love that you throw in random tips here and there as well. You literally started from the bottom and you are living proof that success can happen if you want it and if you work for it. Everyone, listen to this." I'm so, so blessed to be reading that out loud to you guys today. Honestly, when I started this podcast journey, I remember when I first released this podcast that very first day I was beside myself. I couldn't believe what I was doing.
I had the negative thought army that day, I'll never forget it, marching in. I have thoughts like, "Who do you think you are? Who do you think you are to be even doing this?" I never tire of the DMs I get from you guys and the comments I get from you guys, it's literally fuel to me, so thank you. Also, when you guys leave reviews and ratings on my podcast, it helps this podcast get discovered by more people. Thank you for doing that, if you've already left a review, but if you haven't, I would greatly, greatly appreciate it. And if you do that, you may be featured on a future episode.
Before I play Courtney Clark's interview with me, I just want to share a thought that has been pressing upon my heart over the last few days and it's on the concept of suffering, because every time we experience pain, we fight it. We fight it so hard, but suffering is, I'm sorry to say necessary for growth. Oprah said that and it's really weird because that's counterintuitive. When you experience pain, pain, meaning basically you're not in control, you want it to stop. You think it is actually shrinking you, but in fact it is growing you. It's literally the only way we can expand, because I remember growing up, my parents would tell me things like, "Save your money. Don't buy frivolous things, invest your money wisely."
And I was like, "Yeah, sure." I technically heard the message, I heard it, I could repeat it back to them, but I didn't hear it in any way that would actually change my behavior. It didn't truly transform me. I wasn't truly transformed until I suffered the consequences. I was on my own. I was on my own. You're going to listen to this interview and find out. I was on my own after I just blew a bunch of money on dumb things that I don't even remember. Then all of a sudden I found myself in debt and the red unable to climb out. #20s. Totally, I feel like so many of us have been there. Some of us are still there, and if you're going through anything difficult right now, understand that challenges are teachers.
Our emotions are just visitors and any emotion that is strong enough to destabilize our arrogance, that's all it is. Any emotion that is strong enough to shake our arrogance and our ignorance is the only thing that will cause us to grow and expand ourselves. Can I get an amen? Any pain that stems from simply not being in control, that's it. It's there for us to extract wisdom from, to extract good from, and that good, that goodness, once you plow through it and come out the other end, that wisdom is gold. And if you don't learn how to transform that pain into something great into something that makes you better, you will stay living in agony and you will transmit that pain to everyone you love. Your children, your family, your community.
I am going to end this thought with a quote by Richard Rohr and he says, "If your religion is not showing you how to transform your pain, it is junk religion. It is no surprise that a crucified man became the central symbol of Christianity. If we cannot find a way to make our wounds into sacred wounds, we invariably become negative or bitter because we will be wounded. That is a given. All suffering is potentially redemptive, all wounds are potentially sacred wounds, but it depends on what you do with them." I love this quote so much I can't even tell you, because it takes once unbearable pain from something unjust and out of our hands and turns it to the most powerful gift we've ever been given. It's all a matter of how we respond.
I hope you guys enjoyed that five minutes of inspiration. Here is the interview now with Courtney Clark, where we go through the times that I've suffered and what I've done, what I had to do to transform into something that would make me better and serve myself, my community and my future family. Here we go.
Courtney Clark:
What is going on you sexy, sexy ladies? I'm so freaking excited to bring you today's guest. She is the one and the only, the epitome of brains and beauty and a whole lot of grits, multimillion dollar business owner, powerhouse female entrepreneur, and host of the Pretty Rich podcast, Sheila Bella. Sheila is not only a raw, real and hilarious soul that wears her authenticity on her sleeve, but she is also an entrepreneurial genius and a huge inspiration to women all around the world. She built her multimillion dollar empire in just three years. And now she is here to talk to us today to tell us a little bit about how she did just that.
Ladies, sit back, relax, get yourself a pen and a paper, because this is the stuff you are going to want to get written down. Let's waste no more time and let's freaking dive in. I want us to dive into all the way in the beginning of your journey because, and I mean with every single inch of love in my heart, because now you're a badass, but let's be honest in the beginning, just before you started building your empire, you were just a little bit of a hot mess, right? Diving into patterns that were self-destructive, when you were in your job before you started your entrepreneurial journey.
Let's just talk about that for a little bit, because I think that people have this perception of you when they look at you now, people like you now, and they're like, "Wow, there's something special about these people." But you and I know that we're regular. We're regular and we got this. Let's just get a real enroll from the very beginning and tell people about that a little bit. Your journey just before you started.
Sheila Bella:
Okay. Man, I freaking love you. Yeah, I'm no different than you, I'm just willing to look stupider. That's all it is. I'm just willing to look... I'm just willing to embarrass myself more.
Courtney Clark:
I love that.
Sheila Bella:
My gosh. There's this video on YouTube, I don't know if you can find it. Anyway, there's this video on YouTube of me at a club, it was at Bar Dough. I remember that night. I had my red, lace, tight, short things out. You can picture it. I was there with a girlfriend. I was just trying to do the thing that you're supposed to do to find happiness. That's what you're supposed to do. I was just going into the music and then there's this camera crew that comes up and then zooms in on my cleavage.
Courtney Clark:
My gosh.
Sheila Bella:
Then I'm like, "Ha ha ha ha ha ha." Just laughing at it. Then the host is like, "Darling, what's your name? Darling, what's your name?" And I was like, "It's Sheila Ferrari, like the car." I meant it with all sincerity at the time and the host is like, "Sheila Ferrari like the car, of course." Of course. I loved my name and then I watched it back and I was like, "Well, she's fun. She's fun. I like her." I liked me. I knew there was more, but I could see why people would have totally the wrong impression. I was giving them the wrong impression. I actually thought that playing dumb was my card. I thought that was my way of getting attention. I really did. I didn't know any better. It's crazy. Right? Because, God, I hate saying the word society.
Anyway, but society. Society at the time was giving me attention for that. I was like, "This is how..." You know what I mean? You just don't know better.
Courtney Clark:
[Crosstalk 00:15:26] that's what feels good. Yeah.
Sheila Bella:
This is the validation I need. Every time I act this stupid or talk this high, I get people laughing. I get people laughing, I get people buying me things, so I thought that was my ticket. I played it up and I don't know, my husband... Well, my boyfriend, I met him during that season of my life. I was just a hot mess. I was working at a Dylan's Irish pub on Hollywood & Vine, which was where all the hot girls who talked really high worked and I was like, "Okay. I'll fit in right here." And I just got divorced and I was dating everyone and everything, trying to find, "Are you on my soulmate? Are you my soulmate? Are you my soulmate? I don't care. I just want to pretend soulmate for today."
Anyways, my husband met me at that time and I was that girl. I was Sheila Ferrari, like the car. I was that girl and that's what I told him.
Courtney Clark:
[inaudible 00:16:32].
Sheila Bella:
I didn't want people to spell it wrong. Anyway, he tells me to this day, he was like, "I knew it. I knew it. I knew there was more. " And I was like, "I fee..." He feels like he disco-
Courtney Clark:
[Crosstalk 00:16:49].
Sheila Bella:
I don't. I really don't take any offense to it at all, because I knew what I was putting out there. I knew the vibration I was putting out. I knew the way I was trying to get attention, but he just keeps saying, "I knew there was more, I saw through it. I feel like if you were a stock market, if you went public, I got in early."
Courtney Clark:
Brilliant. I love that. I love that so much. Yeah. Hot mess.
Sheila Bella:
I know just that little scenario tells you where I was.
Courtney Clark:
Yeah. I hear you. Absolutely. Everyone needs to understand right now the lady sitting across from me has a multimillion dollar business. Let's just throw that one in there and you booked that in three years? We're going to get to that. We're going to get that. I want to know from you first, what was that shift in? What was the shift for you that started say, "All right, this is not the validation. This is not the fulfillment. There is something more, and I know that inside of me now it's time to make something off that."? What was that moment for you that was like, "All right. Time to stop living like this."
Sheila Bella:
Great question. I think, I don't know, for some people there may have been an instantaneous occurrence that, "I get it now." No, that's not a thing. You don’t all of a sudden get it. It's a multitude of experiences and it's the memories that you build, because we're all a product of the memories that we built. I started to realize that the more capable I acted, the more I... You know what I mean? The more I felt respected and the more things were working to my favor. A lot of it is my husband, a lot of it is my husband. When he met me, just like I told you, he felt like he found out about Bitcoin. He treated me super valuably. I know there might be people who are listening to this going like, I don't need a man."
I did. Sheila Ferrari like the car really did. He treated me with respect, he saw me as valuable and-
Courtney Clark:
He showed you almost that respect and validation that wasn't fleeting like maybe what you were experiencing before. He gave you that taste, I suppose, which is probably-
Sheila Bella:
Yeah.
Courtney Clark:
No, I get that. Obviously it wasn't just that, like you said, there's not just one moment that's like, "All right, well that was the day. That was the minute." What was the follow through? How did you get yourself to start going, "All right, now I need to do this thing."? Because you went in a lot of patterns, obviously that were self-destructive. What was the thing that got you to actually follow through with changing your life and turning things around? Because I think that a lot of women listening to this, they'd like to make the decisions and state the preferences. We do that all the time, we're like, "All right, today's the day things change." "All right. I'm in this pattern..."
Not anymore, but then we're falling back into it. What did that follow through look for you and how did you get yourself to follow through?
Sheila Bella:
Man, I really think it was God just putting me at a place where there was no safety net. You got to burn the boat. You got to burn the boat as Chris Harder says. Set it on fire and if it's not there, if there is no net, you will fly. You have to trust that you are going to turn into the woman that you need to be when you need it. Only when you need it, though. If there's no need, you are going to sit. You're going to sit; you're going to go to clubs with your cleavage out because there's no need. But I just got to a point where I was like, "My gosh, I'm going to be 30. I don't ha..." I just got to that place where there was just no choice. It was this or I truly felt to my core that I would be nothing. I would be nothing.
Courtney Clark:
I love what you just said, that that was... That is such gold. I believe that to my very core as well. There is something about urgency. If you do not have an option, I promise you, you will fucking make something happen. The moment you're giving yourself an option, now you're trying to make something happen. When that option is gone, now you're not trying, now you're doing it or you're not doing it. I think that is such gold. I always say to people over and over again, the fastest way to success, the thing that you can do to propel yourself forward the fastest is to rip that safe skin from underneath you, because I promise you will find out what you’re fucking made of. You will become that person you need to be. I love that. That is so, so, so good.
Sheila Bella:
And it doesn't change either. It doesn't change. I'm doing stuff like that now. I just put down the deposit right now for a venue in Santa Monica for an event that I swear I'm going to throw in March of 2020. I just did it. I'm like, "Holy crap. There I go again." It has to happen.
Courtney Clark:
I love that.
Sheila Bella:
I gave the money away, it now has to and it will, because I did that, it will. And I trust that.
Courtney Clark:
I love that. That's so important. As I was saying, we have a multimillion dollar business, that happened in three years. Talk to me about that. What do you create at the speed of that success too? Because when you went into it, was that the plan? Was it like, "All right. Three years’ time, multimillion dollar business, let's do it."
Sheila Bella:
No, that wasn't the plan. My plan was to make the same living as that of a preschool teacher, because it was either permanent makeup or be a preschool teacher, believe it or not. I was at a crossroads now they gave me a big girl job. I need a job that’s going to be an everyday thing, forever and ever. Really, I was looking into being accredited for, because I love kids. I was like, "I can do this." Then I was like, "Wait a second, wait a second." Then I saw this lady that was doing my permanent makeup and I was like, "Her life is cool. Her life is good. I could live that life." And I was like, "You know what? I can make this hotter. I can give this some sex." Anyway, I got my model friends to promote me and everything. The question was, how was it so fast?
Courtney Clark:
Yes.
Sheila Bella:
You know what? I think it's just my personality of just trying things over and over again. The process of trial and error. I don't sit around waiting for things to work for me.
Courtney Clark:
You do stuff. I love that.
Sheila Bella:
I think worrying, even though we all worry, worrying is not a good investment in your success. Just every single day it would be like, "Okay, this is what I'm doing today. That's not working." I would think of something else. I would just, action, action, action, action. That's why I said I preach action all the time, because from everything I know, that's the only thing, that's the only thing that's given me success and it's just constant, constant trial and error. I really think just like sitting there, not investing in your business, worrying about it is such a waste of time. You can try three new different things for your business every single day. You can try Facebook ads. You can try DM marketing, you can try influencer marketing.
You can try podcasting. There's so many things you can do. We almost have no excuse.
Courtney Clark:
I love that you said that because you are the epitome of I've got no excuse. I just need everyone to understand, when you were starting your business, things were not the same as how it is now. Things were not as easy. That's the reality. I know that you were YouTubing how to code your website and you were making it all happen all by yourself. An excuse did not exist for you. You just did the shit that needed to be done. You did the fucking thing every single day and there are so many little, first of all the excuses that creep into our lives now that are holding us back. Where did that ability to say absolutely fucking no to every single excuse that came your way come from?
Was that just in your speed and in your momentum of, "I'm doing the thing and I'm not available to that." Or what was that? Do you think that was innately in your personality?
Sheila Bella:
Yes, I think so. I think so. The question was, where did it come from, the speed of it all?
Courtney Clark:
Yeah.
Sheila Bella:
I think maybe it was my example. It was my example. It was the example of my father who's an immigrant, I'm an immigrant too. We came here when I was eight years old and he took us from a two-bedroom apartment with no real walls in a bad part of town and there was 10 of us. Yeah, there was no real walls. It was really weird. It was holes in between. It was almost like a divider and we had a curtain divider. I remember for one of the rooms. He has a thick Filipino accent, he wasn't educated here, he came here with very little money and he decided to sell used tools in a van in our apartment complex. He decided to refurbish them and he would sell them on the weekend, on the swap meet. He figured it out. He came here with no plan.
Courtney Clark:
Figured it out.
Sheila Bella:
Yeah. That's why I think everything is figure outable. Here's the thing, I think for a lot of people, the rules of society, again, I hate saying that. Anyway, the rules are basically, when you're in high school, you pick a major and that is what you are going to die doing and if you pick a good one, like being a lawyer or a doctor, that is safety, that is security, that is happiness. I saw my dad. Here's the thing. They kept pushing college on me. I remember that. They kept pushing college on me, but then I knew that their example was a lot louder. The way they lived their lives was much louder than their words. It didn't make any sense to me why you want me to go to college when you didn't effing follow the rules and now look at you. I never thought I needed to play by those rules.
Courtney Clark:
I love that. That's really, really good. I think it goes back to that whole thing of, you know what? You got up every single day and you did stuff. You just were not available for the distractions. You got up every single day and you did the stuff you needed to do. It's that bias towards action. It's doing the thing. I love that. I speak about that all the time. That's awesome. That's great. Another thing about you is you have this thing where you're like, "Yes, it's going to be scary. I'm going to do it anyway." That is your big thing. How? How did you get past that step? Past that opinion of others? Because that's a huge thing. That is a massive thing and it's huge for everyone, not wanting people to see you fail, not wanting just those opinions.
What did you start doing to get past that?
Sheila Bella:
It's a couple of different things. The fear of what people think is real, it's real and it's still real to this day, but here's the thing, you will attract those that you are for, and you will repel those that you are not for. You will attract and repel, no matter what you do. You will. If I played it small, I would attract a certain type of person. If I played it big, I would repel a certain type of person and vice versa. If you already know that some people are going to you and some people are not, it just depends on who are you trying to please? Is it people in your family that don't understand what you're doing? Don't understand entrepreneurship? Or is it the woman that really needs to hear your message, that is begging for you to speak your truth? Your truth, your story is their medicine.
Courtney Clark:
Yes. I love that. See now, that kind of mindset, that comes from a place of massive confidence. That is fierce confidence in yourself. How do you think or what do you think it was that gave you that confidence now? What do you think you use to protect that confidence? Because obviously in today's day and age, you got to be protecting their confidence all the time. Your confidence, especially when you're putting yourself out there, especially when you're doing these things that invite people's opinions in. How did you protect your confidence in those situations? How did you build that foundation of your confidence?
Sheila Bella:
First of all, this word confidence thing, what is that? Is that a real thing? I question my own confidence every single day, but that's a great question, Courtney. My answer to that is you have to realize that it's not about you. If you are so inward that it is about you, you will crumble. You will be the most insecure person in the room, but when you go outward and you lead with service and you're truly like, "This is not about me. Let me help you. This is about you." It gives you so much more courage and confidence to speak your truth because you're leading with love. It's others first, you second actually makes you look more confident. Isn't that weird?
Courtney Clark:
I love that. It's that contribution. And I suppose obviously you're biased towards action. That obviously gives you immense confidence in yourself, I suppose as well. I love that. It almost puts a whole different spin on confidence. Like you said, "What is that word?" And it's like, when you think of it like that, when you think of it from that place of when I contribute, it's not about me, it's not about me. Why must my self-esteem be on the line for it? That's almost such a beautiful new perspective on that. I really, really love that.
Sheila Bella:
Are you a permanent makeup artist who's struggling to get the healed results that you crave and you desire? When a client walks out of your salon, you're like, "My goodness, I did so amazing. She's going to love them. They're going to look so good." But when she comes back after a few weeks, you're like,"[inaudible 00:31:28]. Where did the product go? Where did my work go?" Most of it is gone on or half of it is gone. Let me tell you that ever since switching to Tina Davies' products, my retention is 90% for microblading, which is super high for microblading. Hello? And my healed work, you guys, comes back brown, not blue, not green, not purple, not red, yellow, orange. Brown. My customers are happy.
I'm happy. All my artists are happy. It's such a win, win. I can't thank Tina Davies enough for inventing such easy to use products that are simple and quite frankly made for the artist by an amazing artist. Pretty Rich listeners, get 15% off if you just type in the code, Sheila Bella. Just go to tinadavies.com, type in Sheila Bella, and receive 15% off your order.
Courtney Clark:
Going back to how you were and what you became, that was a process of completely transforming who you were. Listening to that part of you that went, this is what I have the to be and then letting her run the show. That was reinventing yourself. How did you start that process? What did that look like for you? Of really reinventing the person that you were, stripping down that old you and building up the new you.
Sheila Bella:
It's more like unlearning things. It's not learning new things, it's just unlearning things and learning to get quiet and really listen to who you are. A lot of times we're in an age of information, information, information, but who are you when you truly quiet down? What is your soul telling you to do? There comes a point in a woman's life where you stop listening to the other voices and yours just becomes the loudest. What does that or what transforms that into the loudest voice? There isn't one moment that I can pinpoint, but I just know that action breeds clarity. If you're cloud in and you're like, "I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do." Just start moving. Just start moving. Just do it, just do it one day at a time.
Take one step and as you build your business, as you think about the words you're going to say when you quit your job or as you, I don't know, go to your fertility appointments, it’ll just come together. All of these things that are scary. Building a business, quitting your job, having a baby, moving out of your house, whatever it is just don't retract. It'll just come and just learn to be quiet and really listen to what your soul wants you to do today. How your soul wants you to serve others today. A lot of it too is knowing that even though you don't feel like showing up, even if you don't feel like showing up, listen to your feelings, just ride your feelings and you need to show up number one for yourself. Number one for you.
Courtney Clark:
I really, really love that. It's like, get to know yourself, get tight with yourself. Really dig into that, then get so focused and just do the thing. I love how everything that you're saying comes back to almost what sounds like the core of how you live and that is just action. My gosh, wake up and do the fucking thing because that's what it is. [inaudible 00:35:16].
Sheila Bella:
What you do is really what you believe. That's what I think, because it's not what you say. You can journal this, you can meditate this, but what you do is what you believe.
Courtney Clark:
Yeah. I love that. That is so freaking good. Absolutely love that. All right, you mentioned a little just now that you looked at the whole beauty industry or rather permanent makeup industry and you're like, "All right, I'm going to make those hot. I'm going to make this a thing." Because it was not much of an industry. It was not much of a cool thing, when you were starting out. What gave you the lady balls to look at that and go, "All right, it's not a thing. Watch me make it a thing." Because I love that. That's guts. What gave you that? Where did those guts, those lady balls come from?
Sheila Bella:
The minute I saw permanent makeup, the minute I got it done, I wondered why it wasn't a thing. I wondered why it was only a thing that older women did and didn't really speak about. I wondered from the get go. I'd be like, "Listen hot friends wearing school girl outfits." I'm like, "You got to do this thing with me." And they all looked super... I wasn't even a permanent makeup artist yet, but I remember I told people. I'm like, "I’m getting permanent makeup." Then I remember my roommate at the time, shout out to Sarah Vegas was like, "No way. Permanent makeup?" I'm like, "Yeah, girl. You wear your strip lashes to bed." I was like, "What if you had permanent eyeliner?" I'm like, "Wouldn’t that change your life?"
And I just saw the look on her face like, "What? My gosh." She would never get it done just because it wasn't a thing. I don't know. I just had the confidence that this should be and I guess that part I have to say is nature. That part of it, because I saw it being marketed differently. Nobody taught me that, but I'm like, "This..." I don't know. I just felt like, and now it is, why shouldn't it be cooler? We just need to get the right people who look the "right way" or the kind of customers that I want to do it. Then after that's done-
Courtney Clark:
[inaudible 00:37:28] a vision. Yeah, I love that, because I think that a lot of the women listening to this, they are the women with the dreams that people are going to look at and be like, "That's not going to happen." And it's like, how to be that girl is by, "Watch me do it anyway." That pulsing desire that says, "Maybe not for you, but I can do that." It's that step of nature. I really love that. I think that a lot of the women listening to that are going to resonate with the fact that you said that. That was just in you, it was just there. It didn't make any sense.
Sheila Bella:
Yeah. I don't have any answer there as far as how did that come to my head.
Courtney Clark:
I love that answer. Absolutely love that one.
Sheila Bella:
It was just there. I'm like, "Duh, duh."
Courtney Clark:
Before we actually get on to talking business, talking marketing, because you're a wizard there as well, and people are going to need some of that. I want to talk about when you left your relationship because you were evolving faster than that relationship. Again, going back to the women that are listening to this, they are the women that are pushing their potential, so they are the women that are likely to find themselves in a situation where maybe they are with someone, but they are speeding ahead and it's just not coming with them. Was the relationship toxic or was it something you had to look at and be like, "All right, I'm moving now and now it's time for this to end." How did it get to that place?
Sheila Bella:
What was more difficult about it, Courtney, was that he was good. He was good.
Courtney Clark:
They are.
Sheila Bella:
He was good. He didn't cheat on me. He didn't beat me. He wasn't verbally abusive. He was good enough, but I just knew that I wasn't just born for good, I was born for great and that made it harder. I’m like, not that I would wish this truly, but like, "Could you do something more obvious?" You know what I mean? "Could you please do something more obvious to-"
Courtney Clark:
Give me a reason, man.
Sheila Bella:
"Give me a bigger... Here is a prostitute, I'm going... Do something terrible, that way it'll be easier for me." That's the thing. You got to know, you got to leave good for great. You have to allow yourself to believe that you were born for incredible things and if you have one life to live, that's why... See, I tell my husband this too, my present husband now. Like, "That's why you know I'm really freaking into you because I've done it before."
Courtney Clark:
And you'd do it again.
Sheila Bella:
You know what I mean? I'm not afraid to leave... Okay. I am afraid, but I would leave a situation that wasn't optimal.
Courtney Clark:
On that level. Yeah. You love yourself on that level that says, "I know what I want. I know what I'm worth and if I'm not getting it well, I'm going to go find it." I think that's important for everyone listening to this. Maybe if you're in a relationship right now and you're starting to feel that or you've been in a relationship for a while and you know your growth is happening faster than their growth is happening or maybe you're going to find yourself in a situation like that in the future, whether it's a partner or a friendship or whatever, and you know you are progressing.
You have to understand, you got to love yourself a little bit more than you love the comfort of where you are, because things are going to propel in your life a hell of a lot more if you are in your lane with you, where you need to be in, loving yourself on that level, setting that standard. Because like Sheila was saying now, when you set that standard of, "Hold up, if this is not living up there, I can leave. I've done it before. I know that I have that in me to let things go, if they're not adding to my life in that extraordinary way." That's a powerful thing. I really just wanted us to quickly touch on that one because I think that a lot of people like you and I, a lot of women like you and I, a lot of women listening to this, that's likely to pop up at some point, even if it's not a romantic relationship.
In friendships, if you are pushing a potential every day and the people around you aren’t doing that, you can be afraid to move along by yourself until you find those that are in that lane with you, pushing their own potential. I think that-
Sheila Bella:
It's really hard too, especially if you're into self-development.
Courtney Clark:
Yes.
Sheila Bella:
If you're into self-development and personal growth to be with a partner who is not, I really feel for those people who are in that situation, because it's very difficult. I just want everybody to know who might be in that situation that I was confused, it wasn't like, "Okay." It wasn’t a clean, super moral. "Chris, I realize that I'm growing at a lot faster rate than you, so I'm going to leave you now." No. It was more like, "I don’t know. Am I going to live with you then I don’t? I don’t know. I don’t know what to do." I’m like, "I'm going to move out for a little while and then..." If you're having thoughts of that, ladies, that's probably what it is. It's the conversation of, "I'm growing at a lot faster of a rate, I don't think you're going to be able to keep up because I can feel it in my soul." You know what I mean?
Courtney Clark:
Yeah.
Sheila Bella:
It's messier. It's more complicated. I don't judge people who-
Courtney Clark:
Absolutely.
Sheila Bella:
...are going through this stuff.
Courtney Clark:
Yeah. Like you said, if it's so good, it’s still so good, it's still so comfortable, no one cheated, no one hit anyone. It was just... We're happy, but not happy enough.
Sheila Bella:
Are we? Are we happy?
Courtney Clark:
Yeah. I get that. Like you were saying, for those that are in that situation, know that it's normal, know that Sheila didn’t have the clean break, most don't have the clean break, it's not the way it works. Cut yourself a little bit of slack if you're not right up and ready to just pack your bags and leave because you don't have to have it that clean, it's [inaudible 00:43:26].
Sheila Bella:
Again, same thing. Action breeds clarity. I left him slowly and that sucks for him, right? Yeah. Chris, I'm sorry, but you're happier now if you're listening to this. I'm glad you are and so am I. I left him slowly, but it's also knowing yourself, listening to that voice. Listening to that voice and just trusting that just if you just move, it will become clear. It will become super clear. Yeah.
Courtney Clark:
I love that. All right. Well, thanks for taking us down that road a little bit. I really, really, really love that.
Sheila Bella:
Yeah, you’re welcome.
Courtney Clark:
Let's shift back to business. I want to know your failures and your mistakes in the beginning because the beginning is that hard part where nobody knows what to do and yes, action breeds confidence, but what were some of the mistakes that you just wish somebody would have freaking told you in the very beginning?
Sheila Bella:
A lot. Oh my God. Should I write this down? I'm not writing it down. The first thing is I didn't pay attention to acquiring knowledge, not as much. I paid attention to my gut instincts, which is something I did right. I paid attention to people's patterns. I felt like I knew people's patterns, especially when it comes to the sales. Sales is psychology. That's all it is and if you're aware of people's psychological patterns, you'll be good at sales. But here's the thing, had I just picked up a sales book, God forbid at the time I would have been like, "That's the thing that I know innately and a formula." Not acquiring enough knowledge in the beginning. I feel like I would have been smarter with a lot of things, although I did fine.
The other thing is, oh my God, I have so much regret about scarcity mentality. Scarcity mentality, and not collaborating with people in my field. I have a lot of regret about that. About looking at other women as competition. I did. I did and I can tell you that it doesn't make sense now. Now it's so clear to me that the business owners that did collaborate in the end made more money and there is enough to go around for everyone. I really thought that it was a narrow lane. Like the Sapulpa to pass, if you live in LA, you know what that is. Anyways, I thought it was a narrow lane and there was a traffic jam, but that's not what it was like. It was more like a vast garden with beautiful, bright sunlight and everybody's plant grew far away from each other and everybody…
That's what it is. That is what it is. I'm not even making that up because it'll feel good to think that way, it's actually what it is.
Courtney Clark:
Literally, yes. I love that.
Sheila Bella:
I have lots of regret about that. Wish I would have made friends sooner and been less scared of women, but I guess I went through that so that I can teach you guys now, that if there's somebody that you’re a little bit hesitant of becoming close with, because they're in the same industry as you, nip that in the bud now. I swear, if you reach out, you will make more money, you will feel supported because she's probably the only one who knows what you're actually going through and you build each other up. It sounds so corny, but for real though.
Courtney Clark:
[inaudible 00:47:06] women that support each other. I agree with that. I think I also learned that the hard way. It gets lonely. It sucks that you're trying to do it by yourself. Find yourself some girls, find yourself some women doing what you're doing. It makes a difference. Like you said, there is more than enough to go around and bottom line is, people in the same industry as you, your clients are not going to connect with that coach and this coach is not going to connect with that client and understand that there is something about who you're hiring, whatever it's for. Whether it's beauty like Sheila does, whatever it is. There are people that are your people. There are people that are her people. Her people are going to be her people. Your people are going to be…
What is meant for you cannot miss you and we have to get into that mentality. Do you understand the incredible power that comes with joining forces with women that are like you? There is something that it does to what you believe about what you can do as well, which I think that that was a real game changer for me. Is having those people who are like me, similar to me in my corner. That's something that builds up how you feel about what you can do a lot faster than not surrounding yourself with those people or surrounding yourself with people who aren't like you, you're not going to feel understood. It veers your focus off a little bit. If you're not in that bubble the whole time with those kinds of people, it does. It shifts your focus.
The people you surround yourself with and holding hands with women that do what you do and do things like you do things, that is going to get you there so much faster and like Sheila was saying, make you more money, which is what we all want.
Sheila Bella:
Yeah.
Courtney Clark:
That's right.
Sheila Bella:
Collaboration is the shortcut. It's a shortcut. Whether it's collaboration with a colleague or a mentor. That's how information is transferred. Every single time that I've been changed, it wasn't through a law, it wasn't through a quote I read not really. It was through a relationship. Like I told you, I met my husband, he valued me, he saw more in me. It was through relationship. Then I took that permanent makeup class. My old teacher mentored me to where I am and so on and so forth. We're changed and we're improved through the refining of each other.
Courtney Clark:
Yes. I love that. As you were saying that, I was just thinking back on my own journey of just the angels that have been in my life and like you said, it is that. Hey, these people and these relationships and these networks, that's where the magic happens. That's where the far stuff happens. Otherwise, we're reinventing the wheel the whole time. We're going along these processes and wasting our time. That is so good. That is so, so important. I really love that.
Sheila Bella:
Yeah.
Courtney Clark:
One thing that I said to you just now, and one thing that everybody who follows you or know about you is you are so real and you're just so raw and you’re so-
Sheila Bella:
[Crosstalk 00:50:19]. Okay.
Courtney Clark:
...and again is the best. I love that about you. From the get go, when I first even heard about you, months and months ago, I was like, "This woman, she comes on there. She's not perfect." And everybody loves that about you. You'll come on there and you'll make mistakes and I think that's one of the most beautiful things about you and the most phenomenal things about you, that authenticity. I want to know what you think your authenticity has done in scaling your business, because we need more reasons to be authentic, give us more reasons to be authentic. Give these women listening to this more permission and more understanding as to why their authenticity is the thing that is going to scale them.
Sheila Bella:
Oh my God. So much to say about this topic.
Courtney Clark:
Yay.
Sheila Bella:
Oh my God. I'm so sick and tired of just business pages that are just all about business. Your story, I'll say it again like a broken record. Your story is your million-dollar weapon. It is my million-dollar tip. Tell your freaking story.
Courtney Clark:
[Crosstalk 00:51:34].
Sheila Bella:
Who are you? Who are you? Are you a product? Are you a bottle? Are you a spray tan bottle? What are you? You're a human for crying out loud. There are so many pages out there that have attention and they could be utilizing that attention for so much more at least to make people not feel alone. If you're worried that I'm asking you to spill your dirty laundry and talk about your ex the way, I did. No, not even that, not even that, but talk about something meaningful. How's that? How about a meaningful conversation you had with your girlfriend? An article you read that really brought you to tears. A movie you watched that really resonated with your soul and told you something about life.
Why else would people follow you if you just have pretty pictures of your product and that's it. Be a real human. Authenticity to me has helped me in business. I think, especially when I was dealing with clients on a personal level, because in the beginning I wasn't doing that as much. I got all these influencers to promote me for free because I talked to them myself. I talked to them myself and I spoke hottie. I spoke hot. That helped my market research during that time, that I was waiting tables, helped. I think that's a part of it. People give themselves the permission to be exactly as they are when you do.
Courtney Clark:
Yes. You know what? We're not going to go into too much of this right now because I want you to do this, I want you to spill on marketing in a minute.
Sheila Bella:
Okay.
Courtney Clark:
Going back to what you're saying there, sales marketing, that psychology and we need to understand something about the way people work just on this topic right now. People are drawn to something or away from something by the way it makes you feel. If you are connecting with someone, you are going to be drawn towards them and people are drawn towards authenticity. People connect with authenticity. If you're building your business, building a brand, whether it's a product or a service, whatever it is, when you're putting yourself out there in that way that people are drawn to you, people are going to give you money. People are going to buy from you. That's what it's all about. That is why people want to invest with you. That’s the foundation of all of it.
Sheila Bella:
Jonathan Haidt says that... Yeah, I think it was Jonathan Haidt. Jonathan Haidt says that the mind is not a logic processor, the mind is a story processor and you forget logic. Stories are the way that we've inspired each other and have kept our traditions over the years, over centuries. Storytelling is literally the oldest trick in the book. We are drawn to stories. Hollywood is a billion gazillion dollar industry because of stories. We love stories, so tell your freaking story. What are you doing? What are you waiting for?
Courtney Clark:
So good. So freaking good. Okay. Because we are running super tight on time, we're going straight into marketing because you are so good at this. You are just excellent at this; you know so much on this so I'm going to give you absolutely zero guideline. I'm going to say, tell us how to market on social media. Give me your best stuff right now in a short period of time, because everyone building their business or building their brand is likely doing it online at some point in some way. Other than storytelling, what are maybe your top few tips that you would-
Sheila Bella:
A few tips.
Courtney Clark:
Yeah. Give to someone in a...
Sheila Bella:
How much time do we have?
Courtney Clark:
Let's go for it and I'll start speeding if need be.
Sheila Bella:
Okay. Number one, poetic doesn't sell it. It doesn't sell. You need to speak directly to a known problem. To a known problem, a googleable problem and you should use that in your ad copy and your caption copy and your website copy and when you're doing stories and when you're doing videos, you should be selling to a known problem. The only reason why women, if women are your clients, men too, but mostly I study women, I love women. The only reason why women buy is for one simple reason alone, is, can you help? Can you help? Period. Every single time I've bought something, it's been an emotional purchase and it has helped alleviate some pain point in my life.
Courtney Clark:
Solve my problem.
Sheila Bella:
Yeah. Whether it's this [inaudible 00:56:46] handle that I have back here or this beautiful podcast microphone that goes with my decor, it has helped solve a problem. Number one, you have to know your ideal customer. You have to know her intimately. I'm not just talking her demographic and her age and where she comes from. Nothing like that. I'm saying, know her intimately. I want you to know her so well, study her so much that you know what keeps her up at night, that you know what she's googling in her search bar, that you know what her pains are, her deepest pains. And you also know the exact, the exact verbiage that she's using to describe her pain, not what you assume it is, but whatever it is you're trying to sell, what problem does your product or service solve?
I would do a lot of research on that because I think what people do is they jump the gun, they build the website, they build the funnel, they build the email marketing list, whatever it is before they're doing the market research, not on a book, actual people, actual people. I would definitely spend some time in Facebook forums where people are talking about this problem. What are people YouTubing? Go to a YouTube video that perhaps solved the same problem that you're trying to sell. Look at the comments and I would write down exactly what people are saying. I would take those exact words and put them in a word document or my notes. I put them in my notes and it's a word document of all of the ways that my ideal customer explains this problem.
Courtney Clark:
So good. Everything-
Sheila Bella:
And use that in your copy.
Courtney Clark:
So much of this is, literally it's knowing. Knowing that that ideal customer to the T. Knowing exactly what she's Googling, knowing exactly... Know her so freaking well, so that you're-
Sheila Bella:
[Crosstalk 00:58:56]. Intimately.
Courtney Clark:
Yes. I love that. I really, really think that's really, really good.
Sheila Bella:
Yeah.
Courtney Clark:
Awesome. Fantastic.
Sheila Bella:
That's what I can give you in a nutshell, is knowing who your ideal customer is.
Courtney Clark:
I love that. I think that's really, really important.
Sheila Bella:
A known problem. Knowing that poetic doesn't sell. At the end of the day, it doesn't matter if your website's pretty, if your logo is pretty, people aren't buying your logo. Okay? They are fixing something in their lives. It's so much simpler than we're making it.
Courtney Clark:
Yes. That is so, so true. It is so much simpler than we make it. Marketing, all of it. It really is. Okay, give us something real quick. I'm going to ask you what is at this point in time, the best way to be marketing? Is it stories? Is it posts? Is it Instagram? Is it Facebook? Is it all of the above? What do you think it is at the moment?
Sheila Bella:
Again, it boils down to where your ideal customer is. Where is Gretchen? Where is Gretchen Wiener? Gretchen Wiener is my ideal client. What is she doing? Is she on stories? Is she on Facebook? I think some market research on that would be great. My ideal customer is on Instagram, my ideal customer listens to podcasts. It's not where you are, it's where are they? I'm hearing BT Dubs, that there is a lot of business to be made and to be garnered on LinkedIn right now, because it's the wild, wild west, because there's no algorithm there. There isn't. If you put something, it's seen. Yeah, that's another tip. I say try all the different platforms and really get down to Gretchen wieners and figure out where is this bitch?
Courtney Clark:
Find that girl.
Sheila Bella:
[Crosstalk 01:00:50] living? Where is she spending her time, where is her attention. And wherever her attention is, is it on bus stop ads? If it's on bus stop ads, then get your ad up there.
Courtney Clark:
And from bus stop ads, you-
Sheila Bella:
[Crosstalk 01:01:03]. Yeah. Is she taking the bus to work? Because if she is, you better put your face on that bench.
Courtney Clark:
Yes. I love that. That's really, really good. Putting that all into a little bit of a nutshell, it's first of all, get really authentic. Get that connection then know who you're connecting with down to the freaking bone. Know exactly who she is, know her problems and solve her problems because that is quite literally how simple it is and make her know you're solving her problems. Don't sell her the airy fairy stuff because the airy fairy stuff doesn't tell her you're solving her problems. Tell her you're solving her problems.
Sheila Bella:
[inaudible 01:01:40] airy fairy.
Courtney Clark:
Tell her you're solving her problems so she's going to know you're solving her problems. I think that's really, really good. Before I ask you our last question, where can everyone find you, work with you, Instagram? I'll put all the links in the show notes, but tell everyone so long.
Sheila Bella:
Thank you, Courtney. By the way, you are so pretty. I love pretty girls.
Courtney Clark:
My goodness, so are you. Aww, that's so sweet.
Sheila Bella:
It's like having a pretty therapist. I’m having therapy right now. You're making me talk. I'm like, "My therapist is so pretty." Where can people find me?
Courtney Clark:
Yes.
Sheila Bella:
I love the gram. If I'm your ideal client, I love spending time on the ground. It's @realsheilabella. Real S-H-E-I-L-A-B-E-L-L-A, not Sheila Ferrari like the car anymore. I love that girl. Anyway, she meant so well. Real Sheila Bella and you can also find me on my podcast. It's called the Pretty Rich Podcast on iTunes-
Courtney Clark:
[Crosstalk 01:02:50] the link [inaudible 01:02:50].
Sheila Bella:
Yeah. iTunes, Spotify, all the places and sheilabella.com. Duh.
Courtney Clark:
Brilliant. I want to know if you were to put one skill, one tool, one concept, you got to give someone one piece of advice that you credit your success to. What would it be? Not to put you on the spot or anything, but...
Sheila Bella:
No, it's cool. That was my job today. Spotlight time. One thing that I could credit my success to is grit.
Courtney Clark:
Love it. Freaking love, it. Do the fucking thing. That's what it is, do it.
Sheila Bella:
Just be gritty about it.
Courtney Clark:
Yes. I love that.
Sheila Bella:
[inaudible 01:03:38].
Courtney Clark:
Thank you so much for coming on and for giving so much value and you were just so fantastic. I love you so much. We're going to do more of this at some point, because I think you're just so great. I love your story. I love what you're about. I love your authenticity. I love how freaking real you are and you're also drop dead gorgeous.
Sheila Bella:
Aww. Thank you.
Courtney Clark:
Everyone will see that. She's got two kids. I feel like that needs to be a thing that I just announce before everyone goes like, "Darling, you have two kids?" Just by the way.
Sheila Bella:
I was late today because of those little buggers.
Courtney Clark:
Shame. Thank you so much for coming on.
Sheila Bella:
You're welcome, Courtney. I hope to connect with you again soon. Thanks everyone.
Grey:
[inaudible 01:04:22].
Sheila Bella:
Grey. Say, "Share with your friends."
Grey:
Share with your friends.
Sheila Bella:
Please review my mommy on iTunes.
Grey:
[inaudible 01:04:35] mommy iTunes.
Sheila Bella:
Thanks for listening.
Grey:
For listening.
Sheila Bella:
Thank you so much for listening. It is an honor to be a part of your life. If you enjoyed this podcast or were impacted by this at all, please take a minute to leave us a five-star review on iTunes and share it with a friend. Screenshot it, post it on your stories or feed, your timeline, and don't forget to tag me. I would really love to see that. My Instagram is @realsheilabella. Also, let's carry on the conversation longer. Join our private Facebook group, just for Pretty Rich girls. Just go to Facebook.com/prettyrichsquad and check out sheilabella.com for more information on how to get more support on your beauty entrepreneurship journey and get going on your pretty rich lifestyle. Until next time.
